Friday, May 6, 2011

Press refresh

Friday, May 6, 2011
I finally admitted to myself that I am not the one she loved. i feel the pain and it happened so fast. Anyway, I feel tired… I feel that I have been cheated…  and stubbed with a sharpest knife right through my chest… and let the blood pour forever… losing my breath slowly… made them happy…

i quit my job, I fired myself, I don’t want to see myself again… helpless… depressed… loser…  it’s too painful and nobody could understand it… however, finalize today I ended my lease with my current housemates, and have started packing my belongings, Time to move. Time to move at the end of the month... Never did I think i'd have the courage to just start over again somewhere new in the drop of a hat, but I am. Life wasn't working, I hated it, never got to have a real relationships with my friends/girlfriend. I am not enough… she didn’t give me a chance to choose her… to live with her… to marry her… I guess it’s too late….i am not meant for her…

I need to move on… Taking this time to start being happy, stop everything… i need a straight life… I should know how to appreciate what I have in the present.

Oh God this is life…. this is how my life would be, please show me another way, that there is still an opportunity and life is worth living. 3 1/2 more days then im going, moving my stuff last day of may.

starts today I need a fresh start. Delete the past and start moving forward… press refresh…

my mood: 8.9/10
Enhanced by Zemanta

4 comments:

cheryll

I've been there also and i can really say that its one of the most painful event in my life. but you know after a year I finally realize that even how much you try to hold the person you love if you are not meant for each other God will really find a way that you will go to the person that is really meant for you and will make you even much more happy and contented. just have hope and yes start moving forward you deserve it :) have a wonderful day

zolar

Very sad.. relax.. that's a way of life

Mohit Jain

nice blog.....

Sirleny (silsplace)

Very good: forget the past and live the present.
Have a wonderful day :)

 
◄Design by Pocket, BlogBulk Blogger Templates. Distributed by Deluxe Templates