too tired

Today, afternoon, I came home from basketball. I was really tired, very tired. i played 3 sets, wheeew... i want to rest in my couch and sleep. gotta clean my room later. FBL

Today, morning, i get up early, have a bath, packed my shoes and uniform, gettin' ready to play basketball... gotta go now...tryin' to catch my coach... FBL

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facebook life

Today, at work, i chatted all day, i got tired and i started to fell asleep and lost track of time. Damn, I forgot to finish my daily report for tomorrow.

tonight, at fb, i was suprised when i visit my fb account, i found out that i have wall post that i know i didnt made. btw thank you for doin the effort for me. FBL(facebooklife).

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HIV

Whew!!! i know It's been a long time since i wrote a blog about my life as day leaps another day..

So now, im back. but where would i start? I guess i made it already CHEATER and as i am writing this blog.. im sitting here on my bed.. listening to the song that i made and i upload it in youtube and of course it fits my current life..

thinking of what else of to do next... kinda lonely.. remembering the girl i used to love so truly and cheated me a several times before it's already over..the girl who gave me reason to be careful of my heart next time... the girl who wasted my love and trust...

i never thought could be this complicated at very moment.. she cheated with me.. replacing me with a guy that she don’t even know, she just met him only at the pub, grrrr... i wish she acquire HIV.. ohh god.. you may think it's absurd but..i took the pain for almost 3 months in the last time she cheated me... our relationship end up with nothing but lies...

im trying to smile now..im learning more.. im always hurt.. im always left.. i feel so alone..

now, im scared to love again..but who knows? im still young and could find someone better than her..

I guess that i should keep myself busy.. i wanna start a new life without her.

i want to forget my sorrow..and hope things will get better..sooner or later.. cheater! Lier!

my mood: 8.9/10.

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The interview

Day 99 – part 2 Sunday scribblings #188 - Interview

I turned around one last time to take a look in the mirror. This is the first job interview and I am nervous to the point of shaking; every hair has to be in place. i stands in front of the long mirror above the sinks, watching my appearance. then, I went back to the reception, waiting for my name to be called.

The interviewer looked up from the resume and she asked, "Jeremy?" I nodded. "Sit down Jeremy." The interviewer motioned to a leather armchair in front of his desk . "can I call you jerry. My cousin’s named is Jeremy, and he likes to be called jerry."

"it’s fine, if you love to call me jerry," I said.

"I see," she replied. she looked back down at the resume.

“well, jerry you didn't mention what college you attended. “ she asked.

“is it required?” I said.

“of course, if you need the job.” She replied.

”Why?“ I asked.

“ Don't ask questions. That's how the system works. “ she clarify.

“Why does it matter? I'm applying for... “ she interrupted me…

“Don't ask questions. “ irritated.

“ It's a college in Mindanao. I only came to Manila just a few months.”

“ The college's name, Mr. Jerry.” She asked, with a high tone.

“Mindanao College of abbu sayyaf” I said.

“I've never heard about it. Are there...” she said.

“darling, It's in Mindanao, you know... with abu sayyaf on the hood..” my voice was a bit rude.

“any people still waiting outside?” she punched a button on the speaker-phone

“But I can show you my grades... or a sample of my work... or.. just give me a try…” i speak with a low tone.

“please bring the next applicant please “ talking to speaker phone.

“I can get some more information about the college, or... “ i continued, but she cut it.

“don’t let them wait please, where is the next applicant?!” she shouted.

“ I can call my college dean department “ my voice was harsh.

“This interview is over. You need a college to get the job.” shouting.

“ To be a Dishwasher? “ grrrrr.

I turned back and headed to the main door, I am upset, really, really upset.

"Madam, you don’t know how much this job means to me" i reached at the back of my pants, I pulled out a .357 Magnum and aimed it steadily at his forehead. "You will give me the job, Or I will pull the trigger?!” I am cool and smiling gracefully.

she smiled broadly showing her teeth. "I like your style, Jeremy. Congratulations. she leaned forward and hit the button on the speaker-phone. "Karen, politely tell the other prospective to fuck off. We have our man."

my mood: 1.9/10.

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it’s not easy..

Day 9

baby this current time, I don’t want to finish the day that I haven’t sending you a letter or a short word that comes in my deepest heart..and here it goes.. You know it’s not easy being away from you, But being in Saudi Arabia it doesn't change the way I feel about you in my heart. Sure I'm lonely , and sometimes I'm overwhelmed with this emptiness in my chest. But baby, I love you , I’m in love with you and Just now I’m thinking of you. You are always on my mind.

The distance is our problem but if we look at it in a different view, we will know this is the thing that can prove our true love. It's not so long yet every dream will be come true in short period of time and we will smile with a tears of happiness in our heart together.

I hope in the future we will have our own kids that you told me you want to have with me.. I am happy if we talk about all of those things specially the long awaited wedding plans and I am glad that you’re not losing your smile and hope.

I will wait for the day we will be together and I hope you will wait for me. we’ve been married in spirit. in God’s eyes we’re one, were one in everything. I’m proud we have those blessing.

however, I just walk and stay in the line for I know trials would be there to test how tough our relationship was. so please stay strong and focus. keep your eye open in me… I will hold you and i will not let you down.. I will guide you in the everlasting love... I love you.. baby.. please wait for me.

my mood: 7.1/10

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