I am hopeless

I am hopeless. I always told that to my myself. i used to blame myself always. I don’t know when is my chance. I promised that I would keep my chin up, stay positive, and be patient. Enough of patience. Enough of promises. I’m fed up in everything I fed up with this place. Its dirty, its gross, I don’t have effort to clean my place, I felt that I don’t have home, I can’t clean up my own mess, I don’t have self motivation with myself I losing hope. I am hopeless. I stand out small in the sea of many people.

Its been a long time I didn’t write my rants. I thought that if I write my complains I would feel better but in time I have been more emotional and sensitive. i never stop thinking. I never stop complaining. I can’t stop myself to feel hopeless. I can’t stay positive. I don’t know when this will be over.

I m a funkin mess. Liar, liar, liar.

My mood: 3.5/10.