something else

day 236

Today is my last day of scheduled office work. I couldn't be happier. I am beginning to wonder if I'm not cut out for the regular schedule most people keep...., anyway, still having a nightmare for the emails i received, i need to forget about it.

however I have only worked a job for 1 year maximum and another contract will be release but i am sure i will be here after my vacation and while i am still here i try to find a new job vacancy somewhere not around here.. but before quitting and moving onto something else.

I find I get depressed after a while, waking up in the dark in the morning, i feel alone, i feel something that nobody cares about me, whatever perhaps i feel i am in the bad mood today, feeling like a robot who must fulfill my programming. Once I'm at work I feel fine however, and even enjoy what I'm doing in most cases. I've had a couple jobs that I really loved, emailing. 

But only one that I can remember not having any feelings of darkness in the morning and that job I was in control of my own hours. I still arrived at the same time, but I think there was a mental difference knowing that there was more choice involved, i know i've got a choice. hmmp.. work is not include here in my blogs.. im just feeling low today..

my mood: 3.6/10.