Saturday, March 6, 2010

I never felt happy

Saturday, March 6, 2010
Day 209

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night, It seems I can’t sleep well. Worries running on my head, I’ve got headache. I’m starting to think that this is all not real, I’ve got a bad start for March, nothing it seems to be okay, I tried hard. But I can’t get out on it. depression after me.

I’m afraid to happen again; my past it’s extremely hard to forget. cheating , lying , emotional abuse. It’s really quiet painful for those traits I think some woman has. And nobody cares about it, nobody knows about it. I know it always not the same. But why is it so hard to trust again? I know she won’t hurt me. & I know she loves me .. but I won’t allow myself to let her all the way in. and it hurts me, it hurts me a lot.

I walked at the sidewalk and hands in my pocket, head look down, feeling down, not having a good day since I woke up in the morning, sleepless night, I just follow where the waters flows, it just like dancing in the rain, my life quite silent, I never felt happy.

I will live this way.

My mood: 6.3/10.



Such a relationship is based upon freedom and can never grow in a jealous heart.

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