Day 98
Well, my days was good but there were just had a few things in my mind that should be clear out. sometimes I just don't know what to do. Sometimes i got confused if the pain hurts me inside of my heart and soul specially my spirit but anyway i am thankful to have Marivic the woman stood next to me and i am trying so hard not to think about something bad and just move on with my life with her, because I just want to love her for the rest of my life. I really need to say, I am delight, and i am very happy most of the day that I am spending time with her talking of over the phone.
I'm so happy that she overwhelmed my life, I am so happy we comfort each other at rough times. and we always talked about if something there were having misunderstanding was going on with us, and i never let the day pass without resolving the issues, in the sense that if ever we felt something were in the bad mood?! i should sit and talk to her. and i know that once get things better it will be getting better and better. and i should always remind the good things when we have been together and not the bad things, of course. bad things will ruin your world.
trust me if you don't have the support on the relationship it will never make it through. i am glad that she’s back to me and help me because she knows that i am trying to get through this and it's getting really hard at times if I felt worried and scared. It makes me weak and sad. My emotions are up and down but I going to fix it myself and i am physically trying to put myself back again because that is the right thing to do. I keep praying to god to help me deal with this in the way that she knows that i need the help but she’s working on it.
Actually, There are days where i go without sleep because i am scared that i am going to lose her and my emotions is freaking out. But i am greatful she never lost patience to me. I love her to be in my life because sometimes i just don't understand most of the things going on in my life, i am not perfect, I'm human that can feel the pain and suffer. anyway i just know that in my heart and soul and things are going to be alright i have faith in god and how he works and i am trying to live my life on god’s way.
I need to think the good times we shared, and i am happy that she's not in pain anymore and i just want things to be okay and i am just trying to forget the negative things and be brave because that’s the things she would wanted me to be.
i am feeling her love inside my body, my mind, my soul and in my spirit and it's a good feeling to see her again. next time wearing her long tail wedding gown, walking to the isles.
my mood: 1.3/10
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