Tuesday, October 13, 2009

breaking inside

Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Day 71

Just another day of my countdown. Today, I just woke up, feeling low. I went to work… as I usually do. I’m not in a good mood, I don’t know why but I just found myself felt empty, my heart was squeezing tight and beating fast. my mind wasn’t stop thinking about life. I am drain and weak. I felt like I am zombie.

I am really not happy for what I was felt for myself. I can’t figured it out, I’m down.... Right now, I'm at work and it's kind of confused because emotions and my mind was thinking crazy things, perhaps I am afraid for losing something. I hope my mood will change in the afternoon, somehow.

So now I am trying to find things. I just have to learn how to just forget things and move on I have never thought that things are never going to be alright. I am breaking inside because I am not sure on how I need to be and how I should be acting but any my case I am just being who I thought I should be but that just other thing I have to worry about in my life.

So, Anyway i am just trying to keep my cool and not judge myself because that would totally be wrong of me and I am not sure I can handle that in the case how my rough life and go of it. but i guess that just a part of my life that I have to learn how to do. I just know that things are totally worth my time and i am scared that i am going to lose what i really want in life. I just have to wait on it.

My mood: 5.0/10


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